Hacks and Infections
by sycon senti
Summary: My first story. it's slow at first, but the title may begin to make sense as time goes on. includes cores, GLaDOS, viruses, turrets, eventual android forms. Oh, and a dragon. Because they're awesome. It won't be a huge part of the plot though. 3 Oc cores included, one minor. Please review and tell me how I can do better, I'm an artist, not an author. rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1

**As said in summery, please review. I did my best to read through and correct mistakes, but if I missed any point them out please. Not really any action yet, this is more of a build up.**

**Enjoy :)**

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><p>It has been almost a year since she'd let the lunatic go. Four months since she found that vault full of humans, and one since the last one met his doom in a pool of acid. She was currently searching through database after database, seeing if there were any other hidden human vaults. But alas, there were none to be found. GLaDOS gave a synthesised sigh, and turned her attention to the test the cooperative testing initiative were doing. They had been fooling around with the exersion funnel ever since she started scouring the databases for more human test subjects. Now it seemed that she would need them to find another database in old Aperture.<p>

"Orange, Blue, I need you two here now." The two robots spontaneously exploded, and the reassembly machine picked up the parts and quickly reformed them in the Central AI Chamber. The two warbled and clicked something to each other in that strange language of theirs, and scrambled over to take position in front of GLaDOS, P-Body knocking ATLAS over in the meantime. ATLAS stood up and knocked P-Body's core out of it's frame. GLaDOS sighed, waited patiently for them to stop squabbling, and began.

"I need you two to go down into old Aperture and find me more data. I will give you an adapter to store any information you find. Remember, you are looking for anything to do with the word 'Human'. Do not look at anything else, and go a quick as possible." The two robots nodded their cores and clicked something. GLaDOS stared at them.

"Do not fail me." With that, the two robots exploded, and the reassembly machine scrambled to gather the parts and shift them to the right part of the facility.

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><p>Dust fell from the far away ceiling every now and again, falling to the floor. Catwalks wound everywhere, like a crazy giant metallic spider web, connecting every part of the vast underground maze that was old Aperture. In gaps that littered the concrete floor, one could see miles and miles of even older facility. But it wasn't this that ATLAS and P-body were after. The two robots clanked along a catwalk, looking around at any sign of offices. The taller one held a device that could be plugged into an old computer. It was designed to store files in a readable format that GLaDOS could use. They carried on, navigating the catwalks through the labyrinth. The shorter of the two stopped suddenly, causing P-body to crash into it. It warbled something and pointed to a large block of what could be some offices. P-body nodded it's core in agreement, and the two set off along the catwalk towards the block.<p>

The door to the block slammed open. ATLAS stepped over the threshold into the gloomy room. In the light of it's blue optic, it could make out the shapes of several monitors on desks around the room. P-body stepped in behind it, and looked around. Both activated their night vision setting, and the computers appeared in a green-tinted clearness. Both robots looked around the room. It had computers in it, which was exactly what they were looking for. They didn't recognise the area either, meaning that there were new files to be found here. ATLAS went to the nearest computer and pressed the button that it knew would turn it on. Nothing. The computer was long dead. The robot called the other over. It chirruped something and went over to the computer. ATLAS gestured to the device and the computer. P-body plugged it in, and the device made the computer come to life. The two waited for it to boot up, optics fixated to the screen until is finished loading, and started looking through the files for anything to do with 'Human'. They found 3 files, and uploaded them to the device. With that, they unplugged it. The computer died, the screen going blank. ATLAS stared at the reflection of his optic in the black glass screen for a moment, then turned to plug the device into the next computer.

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><p>The cooperative testing initiatives were down in old Aperture dragging up any new files for GLaDOS, leaving her with nothing to do but wait. She took the time to deeply scour the facility for any anomalies in the coding. Whilst scanning the turret redemption line, she took to thinking. What would she do if there were no more humans that could be tested? Send orange and blue up to drag down new test subjects from the surface? They might accidentally drag in <em>her <em>though, so it wasn't the best idea. Design new testing robots? Re-program blue and orange so they weren't so routine at testing? Not test at al- No. That was not an option. The only thing she could do right now was wait, and hope the cooperative testing initiative came back with something useful. She snapped her attention back to the facility scan. So far, nothing has come up except for a few cores going around on the management rails. But just now, she had picked up something foreign. A virus. GLaDOS immediately set out to scan and identify this virus immediately, and prepared several removal programs to squash it out of existence. She identified it as... what?

- Virus not identified -

No. That is not possible. GLaDOS had the largest constantly updated dictionary of viruses and malware in the world. Nothing could escape her antivirus and break through her firewall. _Nothing._

Except, apparently, this little clump of coding.

How could something so small get through her firewalls? She attempted to eradicate it, but every time, it still remained. Shifted slightly. Slightly different. But still there. It annoyed GLaDOS greatly. She checked how long it had been there. 12 months, 11 days, 5 hours, 37 minutes and 48 seconds. She traced that date back in her memory and-

_Oh no. It infected the system when the moron was in charge. I should of known that he would- _Even thinking about that little idiot had made GLaDOS feel rage course through her system. _I should of known he wouldn't of maintained the firewalls._ GLaDOS attempted to get rid of the virus a few more times, but, failing to, gave up. It didn't seem to be doing any harm. If it had waited a year to fry her circuits, it could wait a little longer. She turned the attention away to another part of the facility.

She should have used everything to get rid of it. It had, in fact, been _waiting _for the Genetic Lifeform and Disc Operating System to find it. To try and get rid of it. It now knew. Knew what this AI's defences were, and knew a way to get through.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 of this story. Introducing the core oc's I created in 5 minutes flat for this story. Sorry, if you don't like Oc stuff in portal stories. I just couldn't really find a canon character that fit the roles well... Again, please point out any grammatical mistakes I make. **

**Enjoy :)**

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><p>The small core slid along the management rail slowly. It was thinking. It had picked up a virus in a part of the facility several weeks ago, and had investigated it, disguised, hidden and protected behind a stronghold of firewalls. You can never be too safe with those things. After thorough examination, the core determined it to be a sort of Trojan horse virus. A very well made one, the core concluded to herself. It was almost invisible. No wonder it had laid out of sight for so long. Still, a virus was a virus, and a Trojan horse could mean someone else was trying to control the facility. <em>And every AI in this place knows <em>exactly_ what happens when someone else takes over_. She thought to herself. _I would not be surprised if it was that core's stupidity that let this virus in in the first place._ As the core's primary function was programming and creating and maintaining programs, she resolved to get rid of it. A little thing, Easy as pie, right? Wrong. No matter what she did, it simply _did not go away_. And her antivirus was one of the best in the facility, under the central AI. Nothing she tried worked, and eventually, after what could translate to a week of trying in vain to get rid of it, she did what she never thought she would do- and gave up. Taking a scan of the virus into her databases, she resolved to get a better understanding of the virus and find a way to eradicate it. Unless the Central Core got to it. She hoped so.

"Hey, Evelina Hacker! Ya coming or what? I've been shouting at you fer five minutes now!" the core shook itself out of thought and looked at the silvery optic staring right at her.

"Sorry Tecchie, got lost there." Eve shifted herself on the rail, and slid towards the other core. It had black casing, instead of the usual Aperture white. The core rolled it's optic, and turned and started forward again. The two chatted away about random trivial matters for a while. They went through a corridor, along a rail above a catwalk and had turned along a rail that ran parallel to a redemption line. The core with the silver optic plugged itself into a mechanical arm, and proceeded to rescue a few turrets and useful-looking mechanical parts off the redemption line. Eve watched as he plucked another turret off the line.

"I'm different." It told them in a soft, high-pitched voice. Eve pulled her lower optic cover up in a smile. She'd always found something adorable about the turrets. The defective ones made her laugh as well. It was almost enough to forgive the fact that they shot at anything that moved. One's she hadn't re-programmed to _not _shoot at anything that moved anyway. The core deposited the turret on a metal plate next to a broken window leading into a dark, panelled room. After fishing out two more defective turrets and a small heap of spare robot parts, he disengaged himself off the arm back onto the management rail. Eve went past him into another corridor. She went forward, then took an abrupt turn left though a small gap in the wall above a door, designed to be the perfect size for a core to fit through.

"[177_EVELINA] [pass=19466]"

She shouted out, breaking on the rail to halt just before she crashed into an Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube that was leaning on the rail, preventing any core from getting though into the room beyond. There was an electronic buzz, and a panel rigged to respond to the identification of the core and correct password shifted to move to cube out of the way, leaving the path beyond clear for her to pass. She went into the room. There were a load of other cores in the room, all of different colours and voices. There were management rails all over the ceiling, allowing the cores to access every part of the room, and several frameworks with robotic arms that cores could plug themselves into to manipulate objects, recharging receptacles to recharge, separate places behind panels for a core to sleep mode in peace, and generally anything a core could wish for. The room itself was quite large, with the broken window leading out onto the redemption line at one side, and several tables at the other. A turret sat, it's laser pointing at the door to be a nasty surprise to any unwelcome visitors. A metal plate was attached to a rail on the floor, and was used to transport things around the room.

"[146_TERENCE] Technology_ [pass=19466]"

Eve turned around and saw the other core enter. The panel waited for him to move out of the way before blocking the entrance with the cube again. He went to the window, plugged himself into a frame and proceeded to lift the pile of turrets and metal onto the transport plate. She turned around and surveyed the room. A group of cores were playing poker with nuts and bolts as the chips whilst a few others disappeared through a missing panel into another room. Two were having a conversation and one was in the corner, spouting out a string of 'facts' that most of the time, didn't even make sense. Eve sighed at him. She'd offered to fix his core corruption many times but was always met with "The Fact Core is not corrupt. The Fact core is 100% fully functional and the Fact Core's facts are wholly accurate and very interesting." Yeah. Say that when you start spazzing about and say "twelve twelve twelve." Over and over again.

She went over and plugged herself into a recharging receptacle. They also doubled up as gateway into the code of aperture, but apparently only she could find a way to hack into it.

"Fact- Bees have 5 eyes. The two larger ones a-a-are used to create feather pillows and the six smaller f-feet ar-r-r-rats cannot throw up." Sometimes what that core says is more confusing than a paradox.

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><p>GLaDOS watched the two robot step into the chamber. Orange presented the device.<p>

"Good. Plug it in." a receptacle opened from the floor. P-Body plugged the device in, and stood back. The panels of the chamber flipped expectantly as the files downloaded to GLaDOS. The two robots stood nervously, waiting to see if what they had done would please her or not.

"Good work. I'll leave you be for now, I have a few files to look through." The robots blew up, and were reassembled in testing chamber to stay out of GLaDOS's way. GLaDOS took a look at the new files, and was genuinely impressed. There were many, many files to look through, more than she expected from the old systems down in the old Aperture labs. She started sifting through them one by one, discarding useless ones into one folder and storing any that were interesting in another. She looked through them all thoroughly, but unfortunately, nothing on any hidden human vaults yet. She looked at another file, then was about to discard it when

"Wait a minute, what was that?" she looked again at the title.

_"__Human-Shape Android Blueprints__"_

Human shaped robots? GLaDOS, interested, looked down and read through the article.

_Possible prototype designs for humanoid robots._ Below were some detailed sketches of some designs.

_Upload personality core to compensate with lack of test subjects. The human personality traits of the core will have similar, if not identical reactions to a test chamber. __May replace human testing completely if successful._

Below were some more notes one explaining that the project was abandoned in early stages due to lack of budget and unavailable nanotechnology. But it was the _compensate for lack of test subjects _that caught her attention. Of course! It was so obvious! Personality core were literally storage of human personalities, and, as she had known from past experiences, have the ability to make decisions, react to different situations, and generally act... _human. _GLaDOS created a new folder to store the blueprints in, and started scouring for anything else on the subject. It was obvious now there were no more humans left in the Enrichment Centre, but she now had what seemed to be a perfect solution. Nanotechnology- she had access to that. And there was no need to worry about budget. Plus, it would be a use for all of the spare cores laying around. But which core would go first?

If GLaDOS had a face, a sinister smile would currently be spreading over her features. She knew _exactly_ who would be first. And she would make it as horrific experience as possible.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter threeeee~**

**Btw, I've done 10 chapters on this already. And I've noticed that it is so very slow, so I apologise in advance for that.**

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><p>GLaDOS began work on the project right away. She had identified two more files with information to the topic, and had concluded that the project was abandoned in planning stages. Now, however many years later, she would take it up and make it a reality.<p>

First, she needed a design. What humanoid shape would be the most uncomfortable, shocking, awkward and inadaptable to a core? She went over a million different designs, and finally settles on an absurdly tall (tall enough to hit it's head when going through a door) skinny design with long, thin arms and legs. Try getting used to this one in time for testing. She went over his memory of what flaws he had, other than the obvious stupidity. Hmm, cracked optic. A constant annoyance for him to deal with. Annoying glitch when he twitched and sparked every so often? Throw that in. deteriorating battery life? Check. Hmm. She'll make the list longer when she get's round to it. now, to figure out how to build something like this...

It took 3 days, but she finally had a design that would function and be annoying at the same time. In the time of designing, she decided on a few features that would throw him off. First, the central processers were ridiculously exposed, meaning that they could be damaged very easily. The rubbery skin she decided to use to cover the whole bot would be very thin and tearable, meaning the slightest graze would render the whole bot venerable to water. Overall, it was a purposely flawed design, and it would suit _him _perfectly. GLaDOS adapted several assembly machines to suit the job, and had gathered materials to build this android. There was only on piece of the plan left missing.

**Beep**.

**Aperture Science Equipment Location Protocol Activated. All Aperture Science Technologies Outside The Facility Will Be Tracked. Please Select Any-**

"Yes yes, whatever." GLaDOS shut off the announcer. She watched a large image of earth appear on the screen. A large yellow dot indicated the location of the facility. Two small red dots were located somewhat near the facility, but it was the ones located above the earth GLaDOS needed. Unfortunately, there was no tag to tell her what they were, so she decided to bring all of them down. No need for Aperture technology floating around for Black Mesa to find anyway. She selected all of the floating dots, and activated the protocol.

**Beep**

**Aperture Science Technology Recovery Protocol On Selected Objects S-**

GLaDOS shut the announcer off. This was going to be fun. She opened a wireless channel to her target that she never thought she would use.

"Hello again, Moron."

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><p>"Space." The yellow optic of the core darted around frantically. "Space, space, I'm in space, I love space, space stars, space ships, space cops, space cops! Space. Gottaseeitallgottaseeitallgottaseeitall. Space, stars! Orion, Cassiopeia, The Big Dipper! The Big Dipper! Space, space unicorn! Stars, stars, stars! So much space, gotta see it all-"<p>

The core spun around in the vacuum, orbiting another core. This core's optic shutters were closed. Every now and again it twitched- if it was back in the oxygenated atmosphere of earth, sparks would of flown out of the casing of the core. It opened it's shutters slightly, taking in the same old same old view of blackness and little pinpricks of stars. A small sigh escaped his vocal processors. How long has it been? A year? Ten years? His internal clock stopped working when _she_ crushed him. He opened his optic wider, sighing at the crack that split his vision in two. Dust and dirt from space had gotten into the crack, making the crack even more obvious and annoying. He blinked a few times in a vain attempt to clear the dust, then closed his optic shutters again. There was nothing else to do out here than think, and Wheatley did not want to think about anything thing. His thoughts always drifted to the lady. How she trusted him, the way she jumped when he told her to say 'apple', her following him through the facility, counting on him to find the way, the expression when she was finally going free, and then that expression when he had stopped the elevator, the way she beat on the glass in frustration as he uttered those words "Actually, why do we have to leave _right_ now?". And finally, her burnt and bloodied form flying across the room from the stalemate button, and her face as he was knocked out of her hands by _her_, the alarm, regret and... _satisfaction_ he saw as he flew away into the vacuum.

"Space." Wheatley sighed. He looked around. Further off, he could make out the green optic of the adventure sphere, and sometimes thought he could see a portal gun floating around every now and again. Other than that, there was nothing el-

**Aperture Science Technology Recovery Protocol On Selected Objects S-**

Wait. What was tha-

"_Hello again, Moron."_

He froze. No, it can't be.

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><p>Eve was spying on the central AI chamber through a series of cameras she hacked. GLaDOS was up to something, she could feel the vibrations in the code spreading through the facility. Something was going on in the manufacturing area. She would of checked it out if-<p>

**Aperture Science Technology Recovery Protocol On Selected Objects S-**

The announcer was cut off in the middle of the message. Several of the cores stared discussing what this could mean. Was the central AI bringing back the lady? Or was she-

"Is she bringing that moron back?"

"Why would she?"

"Revenge? Face it; space is way too good for him. She must have other, better ideas for him."

"I have some good ideas for that little idiot."

"Shut up Aggression core. We do not need 101 ways to torture an AI right now."

"Fine then..."

"Hey, what's Hacker up to?" Eve opened her optic.

"I'm in the Central AI Chamber right now. Nothing so far..." she shut her optic again. The other cores gathered around Eve expectantly. Waiting to see what would happen.

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><p>Wheatley helplessly watched an Equipment Recovery robot approach him. Two others had already got Rick and the portal gun, and a third was heading for space. Rick was fighting in vain against the robot holding him. The robot approaching Wheatley grabbed his upper handle. He winced at the tight grip on the sensitive appendage. He felt a slight tug, and suddenly he was slowly drifting back towards Earth.<p>

"Oh no. Oh no. No! No no no no no no no!" This was it. He was going back to _Her_. And _She _would most likely kill him.

He noticed, after a while, that they were speeding up the closer they got to Earth.

"SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCEEEEEEEEE!" Wheatley heard the space core screaming. They entered the Earth's atmosphere. He started to feel very hot. No, wait, his casing was starting to glow. His vision flickered as the inside circuits started to melt. All he could feel was burning pain- all he could see was blinding white. Then his optic shorted out. He struggled around, blinded before shorting out completely and-

**CRASH**

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><p>Eve jerked out of the camera view of the central AI chamber. Everybody was looking around, trying to find the cause of the massive crash that they'd just heard.<p>

"Something crashed into GLaDOS's chamber." She reported. She went back to the camera, waiting for the smoke to clear.

"What is it?"

"Can't see right now, give it a minute." The smoke slowly cleared, and Eve could make out three smashed cores and a blackened portal gun.

"Is it the moron?"

"Yes."

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><p>Wheatley slowly rebooted. His optic came back online, and he tried to blink away the new cracks that spiderwebbed across his vision. A few pieces of glass fell out of his optic. He looked around, making out the shapes of the other cores through the cracks.<p>

"Hello, and welcome back to the Aperture Science Computer Aided Enrichment Centre." Wheatley spun around. The cold yellow optic stared down at him. There were some beeps and whirrs from around him as the other cores rebooted.

"I'm surprised all three of you made it back in one piece. Even more about the fact you still work." She loomed over the space core. He whimpered and attempted to retract into his scorched and dented casing.

"It seems like you need a bit of fixing doing to you though. As well as the large hole you punched into the ceiling. Don't worry, I'll see to that."

Wheatley blinked in surprise.

"You brought us back to fix us? Wow, I never expected this. After what I did, well, to you, I was more expecting that you would crush me under one of the Mashy-Spike-Plates or incinerate me on sight. Uh, well, I'm not giving you any suggestions, by all means, go ahead and fix me, I was just saying that this is unexpected of you."

Four claws came down from the ceiling to pick up the cores and what was left of the portal device.

"I thought it would be a good idea to not have Aperture equipment lying around for Black Mesa to find." GLaDOS stated. Wheatley's optic widened in shock.

"You really mean-"

"And I also decided to take the time to kill you." Now it contacted to a pinprick. He should of known it was too good to be true. His casing grated as he turned to look down. The claw lifted him away from the others to suspend him over the emergency intelligence incinerator. _Well, this is how it ends_, he thought to himself. Waves of fear washed through him as he closed his optic, waiting for the claw to release it's grip and to feel the burning heat on his casing.

"But killing you instantly would be too kind." Wheatley opened his optic shutters a crack, and made out the receding form of the incinerator. Relief washed over him. He wasn't going to die. This was great! Amazing, bloody amazing!

"I have better plans for you."

Oh.

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><p><strong>so, introduction of everyone's favourite moron! except, if, you don't like Wheatley of course. I've decided with Wheatley that he won't be a slow idiot that can't tell left from right, and has a bit of common sense, but is overly still optimistic.<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Yooo, chapter 4. of filler. really.**

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><p>"Why didn't she incinerate him?" Eve asked to no one in particular.<p>

"She didn't?"

"No." Eve turned her attention away from the chamber to the cores surrounding her. The silver eyed core came forward.

"That's a surprise. I would'a thought that she would kill him immediately."

"So did he apparently. I don't know what happened to the other three cores, I'll just check that." Eve dove into the code of the facility, then resurfaced again.

"They went to the repair rooms, along with the portal gun. Strange. I thought they would have been incinerated, not repaired..."

"What's she up to?" the silver core asked.

"dunno, Terry, but I detected a whole lotta activity down in the manufacturing part of the facility. She's up to something, but I don't know what." Most of the other cores had drifted off back to what they were doing before the other cores dropped in. Eve went back into the code and went to investigate the manufacturing part. What were they building? She scanned the templates from the database and examined them.

"Human shaped android?" in her scramble to get back to the core hideout, she accidentally tweaked some areas of code. Hoping she didn't just cause a reactor core meltdown, she blinked back into the room and disengaged herself from the recharging receptacle.

"I think GLaDOS is building some new sort of testing robot."

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><p>The claw lifted Wheatley high over Aperture catwalks and onto a management rail. His fried processor sparked as he tried to figure out what was going on. Something on the management rail clicked, and he found himself being automatically driven along. The journey lasted about three minutes, and he found himself stopping in a small room. Suddenly, the panel behind him closed, leaving him trapped in the room.<p>

"Well, I guess this is where I'm going to get repaired..." He looked around. Nothing but panels and a light. "Don't see any repairing equipment..."

"That's because you're not in here to be repaired, Moron." He jumped at the voice. A few sparks flew out of his casing and he twitched.

"I'd really rather crush you. But I have better plans. They will take some time to get ready though, so you will wait here until the time comes. Don't worry, it's no different from floating and doing nothing in space. Except you're in the facility, not space. Enjoy your stay." The intercom clicked off. Wheatley sighed and twitched again.

"I guess I'm not going to get repaired after all..."

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><p>GLaDOS felt strangely uneasy. While she'd been holding Wheatley, she'd felt like someone was watching her. Which was impossible. And just now she felt a pulse of code go through her system. She tried tracking it, but it was gone too fast to follow. There were a few malfunctioning panels here and there, and she fixed them quickly. Was it the virus? A quick scan with the virus's signature told her it was still as dormant and insignificant as ever. She sighed, and went down to check the machines building the android. They seemed to be progressing well. The framework was already complete and the central processors were almost built. She looked at the blueprints again.<p>

Wait. They had been _copied_. Someone had stolen a copy from the database! She tried to track who, but there was no trail. GLaDOS stared at the file, and turned her attention away from it and scanned for any other copies. A quick blip came up, but it was extinguished so quickly GLaDOS only had time to catch the number 177. _Whoever is doing this must be a very experienced hacker..._ she thought to herself. As a precaution, she set up several more layers of firewalls, then turned her attention to the cooperative testing initiative. The two robots exploded and were reassembled in a testing track.

"Get to work, you two."

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><p>Wheatley couldn't believe his luck. He slid freely along a management rail above a catwalk. For some reason, one of the panels in the room he was trapped in glitched out and opened. Wheatley found that he could, with a bit of a swing, throw himself out of the room onto a management rail outside. Granted, it hurt. His damaged insides caught against some loose part of his casing and jarred him painfully, but he was free, and that was all that mattered. He had decided that no, <em>She<em> was not going to repair him, and was in fact going to do something much worse. He had also decided that the panel malfunctioned, because unless it was part of some sort of elaborate plan of hers, and he wouldn't put it past her, he knew that she would not have let him out of that room.

"What a strange and lucky coincidence it was that one, huh."

He wandered blindly through parts of the facility. He tried to make out and markers that could tell him where he was, but his optic had too many cracks in it to see anything clearly. In the end he took to going in random directions. He turned into what looked like a corridor, thinking to himself. He felt another abrupt turn, and went down it, only to crash optic-first into what looked like a cube.

"OW!"

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><p>Eve, along with every other core in the room turned at the voice at the entrance. It mumbles something. Eve waited for a few moments for whatever it was to call out an identification and pass. But nothing. She called out:<p>

"Identify yourself and give password."

"what? Password? Uh, let's see... AAAAA...A? AAAAA...D? did I try B? Oh God, someone write these down"

"I recognise that voice..." Eve turned to look at Terry.

"Who?"

He ignored her, and called out,

"I know you're there, Moron."

Moron! Several of the other cores stared shouting at once.

"It's the Moron? How did he get here? Shouldn't GLaDOS have him? What is he doing here?"

"Everyone shuddup, and let's see what this idiot has to say fer 'imself." Terry had moved the panel out the way. Wheatley was just behind, staring into the room.

"Hey, Moron."

He slowly inched into the room, looking around. Eve noticed his optic was cracked beyond repair, and guessed he could barely see anything.

"U-uh... Hello!" several core's optic narrowed at him. He gave a synthesized gulp and backed away a bit.

"Uhm.. s-so, how are all you doing? Me? I'm f-fine. I..." he trailed off, intimidated by all of the cores staring at him.

"I'm not welcome here am I? Ooh, I get it, shouldn't have thought I would be welcome anywhere after... what... I did... Okay, I get it, I'm not welcome here. I'll... go now... If you want. Of course, if you want me to stay, just stay so and I will. Not that you will of course, but..." he trailed off again, then turned and fled out of the room.

"Fact- the intelligence dampening sphere is feeling deep regret for what he has done."

"Shut up Facty, you can never get your facts straight." One core knocked into the fact core, making it gasp. The rest of the cores drifted away, leaving terry, Fact and Eve by the entrance. Terry turned to look at the Fact core.

"He can sometimes say something useful..." Terry mumbled to himself. Eve turned and went after Wheatley, Terry following behind.

* * *

><p>Wheatley blindly sped along the management rail faster than he thought his mangled body could go. His auditory processors picked up squeaks and creaks of some cores on the rail behind him. Chasing him? He should of known that the other cores would not of welcomed him back. He did nearly destroy the facility, and by extension, them, when he was in power. He tried to make out where he was, but apparently his optic was starting to glitch, and half of his vision went blank. Inconveniently, the half that had the less cracks. He heard a core saying something behind him, but couldn't make out what it was, as he was more worried in making out the turns in time with his less than adequate vision. Failing to do this, he jerked to a stop at a sharp bend, feeling some components on his inside grate painfully against one another.<p>

"Ow!" He went past the bend, and crashed into something. Squinting his half-vision, he could make out a lilac optic of a core.

"Uh oh..." the optic seemed to flash red for a moment. Wheatley backed away a bit, the crashed into something else. Spinning around, he saw another optic, this time silver.

"Oh no..." He tried to retract into himself, but a broken rod or something poked painfully against the back of his optic, making him twitch and flinch. Several sparks flew out of his casing. His half lit optic shrunk to a dot, and he quivered, something inside him rattling. He waited with his shutters closed for the abuse that would be thrown at him. No less than he deserved, though. After all, he did nearly kill them.

"Yo." Wheatley opened his shutters a crack. The lilac optic was staring right into his. He whimpered a little and shut his optic again.

"Yo. Seriously, open your optic." He slowly peered though the crack of his shutters. Half of a lilac optic appeared in front of him. He shifted so he could see slightly better.

"Not sure why I said that, seems like you can't see a thing anyway." Wheatley slowly nodded in agreement.

"I'm sure Tecchie could fix that for you." The core nodded to the on behind it. He turned around to look at the other core.

"Hey, I'm Terence, the Technology Maintenance core. But you can call me Terry. Or Tecchie. Whadever you prefer." The core introduces itself in a gravelly voice. "I used to have a job of maintaining the technology around here, but after the main building robot went missing and were destroyed, I took the job of creating tech for them. Before She took over, of course. But I still build things here and there."

"Yo." The lilac core said again. "I'm Evelina, but call me Eve. I'm a programming core, but I took up a hobby of hacking things early and am now an expert at it. Seriously, no one can detect my-"

"Shut up Hacker. You such a show off at times." Terry shook his casing and sighed. "Me an' Eve, we work as a team. I build robots, she programs them. Foolproof. I don't think we ever built something that malfunctioned. Eh, Eve?" Eve sighed.

"Now you're the one showing off." She turned back to Wheatley. "So, where are you going now that everyone in this place hates your circuits?" he twitched his handlebars a bit in a shrug.

"_You're not going anywhere moron."_

"GAH!" Wheatley screamed, and started panicking. The half of his optic that was still functioning stopped working, plunging him into darkness. He dimly heard the two other cores dashing off over the sound of his overworked processors.

"Think you could escape, huh? Well, I have control over the whole of the facility. You're never out of my sight." He felt a claw grab him and wrench him for the management rail.

"AH!" he struggles, but it was no use. The claw gripped him tighter, and he felt his casing buckle under the pressure. His useless, blind optic drooped, and he shut his optic shutters.

"Good news, Moron. I have just finished an experimental project of mine, and the last piece I need is you. That means I'm not going to kill you. Unfortunately. But by the time I'm done with you, I bet you will be wishing I had."

"What sort of experimental projects? Ooh, I know, you're going to-"

"You'll see." GLaDOS cut him off. "An ironic statement. For it seems that your optic has malfunctioned and you cannot see at all."

"I can see that." Wheatley muttered. Then realised what he had just said. GLaDOS just laughed.

"All the better, Moron."

* * *

><p>Eve and Terry watched the badly damaged core get carried away.<p>

"Why did we run?" Eve asked.

"I dunno. I guess something came over'us. I feel bad, leaving that moron to GLaDOS..."

Eve nodded in agreement. they turned and slid off into somewhere in Aperture.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5. Judging by the view count, I'm guessing people are actually reading this pile of junk. But no reviews. Please, Can someone reveiw? I really want to know how I can do better.**

* * *

><p>Wheatley felt himself get dropped into a tube. The wind rushed past his auditory processors as he was thrown this way and that. The bumpy ride seemed to last forever, but he was finally shot out- a bit more battered and dented than before- into a room. He landed with a clang.<p>

"OW!" he opened his shutters to look around, then remembered he couldn't see, and closed them again. He could hear humming machines in the background, and there was a definite tense atmosphere. Wheatley knew that something was about to happen, but he didn't know what.

"So, do you care to explain what is going on here?" Wheatley asked.

"A transfer." Wheatley felt a claw pick him up.

"A transfer of what? Ooh, where not doing _that _again are we-"

"NO, you Moron!"

"I'm being put into a potato right?" GLaDOS was silent.

"Ooh, I knew it, I'm being put into a potato. Just like I did to you. Wait. Will this hurt?"

"What you think?"

"I'm hoping that is a no, but I'll take that as a yes." He was plugged into something.

"But hey, I deserve it. becoming a root vegetable and all-"

**Core Transfer To Android_Intelligence_ Initiated**

"Just how painful are we talking about he- YYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!"

Wheatley wasn't exaggerating.

All he could feel was burning pain. All through every wire, circuit, port, gear and mechanic in his body, a massive burning pain. It made him wish he was falling through the atmosphere again. _And this transfer doesn't end with me being in charge of the facility. More likely a potato. Or whatever an Android Intelligence Dampening is. I bet it's a fancy name for a potato of some kind._ He suddenly felt the horrible feeling of his core programs being sucked out of his body. _Here we go-_

* * *

><p>- Core Transfer 10% Complete -<p>

GLaDOS watched the transfer with a feeling of satisfaction. She had already created blueprints for some more cores, and if this was successful, she would get to work right away. If it wasn't- oh well. One less moron to worry about.

- Core Transfer 25% Complete -

Come on, come _on._ GLaDOS almost _wanted_ this to be successful.

- Core Transfer 33% Complete -

She watched the bar slowly rise. _Please don't go wrong, please don't go wrong..._

- Core Transfer 50% Complete -

_Comeoncomeoncomeon_

- Core Transfer 67% Complete -

A growing feeling of suspense. This felt ridiculously unnatural for GLaDOS. It wasn't every day she _wanted_ one of her worst enemies to survive something dangerous.

- Core Transfer 75% Complete -

It must be because it was a new experiment for her. And she wanted a positive result. It was the prospect of forwarding science. Yes, that was it.

- Core Transfer 90% Complete -

She waited.

- Core Transfer 99% Complete -

_So close. Come on!_

...

It appeared to have frozen. _No!_ GLaDOS looked around the transfer with annoyance. _Not right now!_

- Core Transfer 100% Complete -

Oh.

- Intelligence_ Has Been Successfully Transferred To Android_Intelligence_ . Do You Want To Start Program? -

_Yes!_ So far, this experiment looked like a success. And GLaDOS always liked a scientific success.

- Booting System -

* * *

><p>- 2% -<p>

- 10% -

- 34% -

- 78% -

- 99% -

- System Start Up Complete. Starting Core Processes In Android_Intelligence_Dampening. -

Wheatley slowly felt himself rebooting. His though process came online, and the first thought he had was _WHAT THE BLOODY HELL JUST HAPPENED TO ME?_ He felt other processes booting, first his sensory nervous system. The first thing he noticed was he felt... _different_. Expanded, somehow. _Maybe She blew me to pieces..._ he didn't feel like he was in pieces... other processes came back online. He opened his optics and looked around. Hey, he could see again. Maybe She did fix him after all. There was a rather annoying crack on one of them though. Maybe he'll ask Her to fi- _wait, one of them? _He panicked and put his hands to his face. Wait. _Hands? Face?_ Finally, his vocal processors came back online.

**_"WHAT THE HELL HAS JUST HAPPENED TO ME?!"_**

GLaDOS was chuckling madly. She'd expected the former core to be scared, but this was priceless. She watched (and recorded) the newly android Moron flail around, shouting and screaming meaningless phrases in shock. _Should I intervene? No._ She kept watching. After about fifteen minutes, he flopped down, either having calmed down, or too exhausted to continue. That would make for an interesting video to watch later. She named the recording 'Moron's reaction to different body' and stored it in a folder. Time to interact and see if this Idiot could use the walking programs she hardwired into the android body.

"Hello again. I see you've finally calmed down enough for me to speak to you, so let's begin shall we? First of all, any questions?"

Wheatley had loads of questions. Unfortunately, his mind was too scrambles to string any together in a coherent sentence, so only a jumbled mix of squeaks, croaks and 'What?'s came out of his mouth.

"Hm. So it seems you have no questions. Okay. Now we've got that sorted, let's get going." Something tugged on Wheatley's back and arms. He looked around just in time to see several cables pulling out of some sockets on his back and disappearing into the machine he was connected to.

"Stand and walk, Moron." Wheatley obeyed. Or tried to. He pushed down on a part of the machine with his hands, and tried to get his legs to respond. First try, nothing. Second try, he started to rise before losing his balance. He gritted his synthetic teeth and tried again. Slowly, he rose up to full height.

"Good. Now, walk towards the door." Wheatley opened his optics and looked at the door. It wasn't too far. Then he looked down.

_OH GOD I'M SO HIGH UP HELP SOMEONE CATCHMECATCHMECATCHME-_

"Really?" Wheatley could hear the exasperation in Her voice at the sight of the android sprawled on the floor. And, strangely, a bit of laughter. He lay on the floor with his optics shut tight.

"Get up and walk through the door."

_Okay Wheatley, get up and go through the door. Like She says so. it's not too high. You've fallen from greater heights before._ Slowly, Wheatley opened his optics and pushed himself up off the floor again. _Okay. Do not look down._ Wheatley wondered how he was supposed to walk. He's seen the lady do it, and knew how it worked. One foot in front of the other. Simple as. So why was he on the floor again?

"Congratulations. You've set a record for distance covered by an android. Six inches." there was a toot from somewhere, and Wheatley made out some confetti floating down from the tube in the corner. "I'll note that on your file."

Wheatley sighed, and dragged himself to his feet again. He tried again and again, getting about a metre before resigning himself to dragging his way across the floor with his arms. He thought that he could ease himself into a crawl, then work it out from there.

"I expected you to fail, but this is amusingly pathetic." Her goading voice echoed around the room. "If you look into your files, you might find a program made specifically to make your legs work."

"So you tell that to me now, do you? Why didn't you tell me that in the first place before I went through all of this?"

"Because it was so amusing. I'll be keeping this footage to show other android how _not_ to fail like you." Wheatley grunted. He located the walking file, and tried to activate it.

- Please Enter Password -

"OH you've GOT to be KIDDING me! Uh... AAA..A...A."

- Password Accepted -

Oh.

Wheatley instantly felt a new strength in his legs. He pushed himself up onto his knees.

"This feels better!" he stood up. Shakily, but his legs held. He took a wobbly step forward. Still standing upright. He took another. Still standing.

"This is great!" he said to himself. He started walking all around the room. Better than being confined to a management rail or carried!

Something caught his eye. He went over to a core receptacle and poked at a lump of blackened metal that was connected to it. It squeaked slightly. Frowning, he hooked a finger in the hole in the front and lifted it. Something inside it creaked and rattled, and he suddenly found himself staring into the cracked and broken optic of a core. His old body. He flinched back a bit.

"Old Wheatley, meet new Wheatley. He is about to become my latest test subject. Now, get the door Moron." Casting glances back at the crushed and scored casing, Wheatley turned and went to the door. He stopped in front of it. It was too short to let him through.

"Uh."

"Crouch." Oh. He ducked under, and went out into the test chamber.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 5!**

**As I'm still getting used to how this website works, I can't personally thank the person who gave the first review, so, thank you, and I'll consider your suggestions.  
><strong>

**also, thanks for any other people that faved this, sorry, I forgot to say that sooner :(**

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><p>"So. I'm going to be your test subject. It makes sense, since it seems the lady has disappeared from the facility. What happened to her anyway?" Wheatley took a look around the test chamber. It was simple, a button and a cube with a pit of acid in between. He watched a panel with a mirrored surface come down from the ceiling.<p>

"I killed her." Wheatley froze.

"You.. killed her? Even after all she did for you, you killed her!?"

"Yep." Wheatley stared into space, then slowly sat down on the ground. He drew his knees up to his chest and buried his face in them. Which hurt, as the knees were unusually sharp.

"Cheer up Moron, it's not my fault she fell into that acid. Maybe the panel that malfunctioned to push her in was though..." the mirrored panel came to rest on the floor. "Anyway, say hello to your new body. It's going be yours for a while." Wheatley stood up and looked in the mirror. He was tall- very tall, his legs were stick-thin and his arms almost reached to his knees.

"Are humans supposed to have these proportions?" Wheatley asked. "I remember the lady was shorter than this..."

"It's just a shape I though suited you. Plus, I thought it would be a nice change from a sphere." _More like the most awkward one possible_ Wheatley thought to himself. He looked in the mirror again, noticing his messed-up silvery brown hair and the rips and tears in the thin, white synthetic skin that covered his body. He lower half was covered in what looked like half of a jumpsuit, and had some strange bits of fabric hanging off his waist. Two handles were attached to his shoulders, what for he didn't know, but were a reminder of the core he once was. He found that they were very flexible, and he wiggled them around a bit before sitting on a raised panel and turning his attention the scraps of jumpsuit-nylon that hung from the metal loop around his waist. They were edged in a strange blue material, the same stuff that ran in a straight line up and down the front and back of his legs. He found that this material connected to itself, and slowly started piecing the rest of the jumpsuit together over his handles.

He was halfway done when a tube suddenly appeared through a panel in the ceiling. A portal gun and a pair of long fall boots dropped out of it. He looked at the camera staring down at him, then carried on with the jumpsuit. Eventually, he finished and went over to put the boots on. He stood up in the boots; they unbalanced him a bit and rubbed against the back of his heel, but they fit well enough. Then, he reached down and picked up the portal gun.

"Finally. We are ready to start testing." Wheatley slid his hand into the device, feeling three buttons on the inside, aligned to fit three of his fingers. It was a tight squeeze with the absurdly long fingers he possessed, but he managed it. He pressed one button, and a dull orange spark of energy shot out of the gun and hit the wall. It opened in a brownish oval. _Huh, I thought it would be the same colour as the lady's portal gun. _Wheatley went up to it and ran his fingers over the closed portal. The surface felt almost like a liquid, but he could not force his hand through. He pointed the gun at another wall and pressed the next button, but nothing happened except the device vibrating a bit. He frowned at it, then pressed the last button. Another blob of energy- this time greyish blue- shot out and hit the wall, opening another portal. He could see himself through the grey oval, and turned to the brown one to peer through. Sure enough, it had opened and he could once again see the back of him, staring through the portal. He took a step through. Hm. He'd expected there to be a strange feeling when he went through, like a shock of static, or some disorientation. But there was nothing. It was as if he took a step down a perfectly normal corridor, not a warp that seemed to tear through the fabric of space-time itself. Then again, he was an android, so maybe normal humans experienced something different going through portals.

"Now you've introduced yourself to the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device, it's time to begin testing. This test is painfully simple, I expect even a Moron like you could figure it out." Yes, he could. He went over to the cube, and after a few moments thinking, pointed the gun at it and pressed the non-portal button. Sure enough, the spikes on the end of it spread apart, and an electrical energy crackled between them, lifting the cube off the floor. He tuned and went towards the grey portal with it, then dropped it to shoot a brown portal over the other side of the pit. Going through the portals, he set the cube on the button to open there door. There, simple. He knew how to test; he'd seen the lady do it.

"Congratulations. You solved the first ever test to be solved by an Aperture Science Human Shaped Android." The door opened, and Wheatley went through. The elevator doors closed around him, and he felt the elevator shift and drop down to the next test.

"But it was simple enough for a child to understand. Let's make the next one a little harder, shall we?" the elevator door opened, and Wheatley stepped out and through the door to the next chamber. He nearly dropped the portal gun in shock. The chamber was a mess of testing elements. Tubes, glowy spinny funnels, lasers, hard light bridges, turrets, jumpy plates, gels, even some things attached to the wall that emitted a ball of electricity every once in a while. He stared around the test chamber.

"Excuse me, but, uhm, is this what you mean by a _little_ bit harder?"

"Why, do you want me to send you to one that is _a lot_ harder?" Wheatley decided to shut up.

"Good."

A panel beside him suddenly retracted, then pushed a small dome-shaped radio into the room. It started playing a cheery tune.

"Enjoy the test."

* * *

><p><em>This was a triumph,<em> GLaDOS thought to herself, making a note of 'Huge success' on the files. Not only had the transfer and boot up been successful, but the android tested well. The only thing holding it back was the Moron itself, but she could fix that. She already was fixing it; the manufacturing wing was already busy creating new android core processors. She wondered what core would be next, then remembered the two cores that had fallen from space along with the Moron. They should still be in the repair wing, along with the portal gun. A scream came from the speakers on the monitor. Wheatley was running around, frantically beating at his hair, which he had apparently set on fire from a Hard-Light-Bridge.

"Those bridges are made of natural light pumped down from the surface. Consequently, they are quite capable of setting your hair on fire if you rubbed your cheek against one. So don't do it." GLaDOS clicked the intercom off with a chuckle, and went to the repair wing that held the two cores.

"Huh?" there was a third core there. GLaDOS checked the core. It was the fact core, the one that kept going on about facts that were usually 100% false. _So it seemed I'll have three new test subjects then._ She grabbed all three with some claws that descended from the ceiling, and dropped them into the transport tubes, programming the tubes to bring them to the core transfer area. Meanwhile, she set about designing the bodies for these new androids. After a few minutes, she had designs she liked for all three of them, and the manufacturing wing was hard at work, building the new androids. The process would be much faster than last time, as it was familiar. GLaDOS watched the machine work, then went back to Wheatley in the test chamber, who was walking up and down a bridge, apparently thinking.

"Get back to testing, Moron."

* * *

><p>Wheatley flopped down behind a panel of the test chamber. He was exhausted and breathing heavily, which confused him as he didn't think he needed to breathe. He ran his finger over the sleek casing of the portal gun. A grey-blue glow emitted from a hole in the top. He stared at it, transfixed. It was this portal gun that had kept him alive so far. He closed his optics and sighed. His over worked processor slowly cooled down as he calmed his frayed nerves. He should of known from the very moment he was recalled into the facility something like this would happen. Okay, not <em>exactly<em> like this, but something bad.

He peered through the gap between the panel and the wall out into the test chamber. He's been working at it for hours, and estimated himself to be about a third of the way through. The panel he was sitting behind was about two-thirds of the way up the wall. An excursion funnel wound past just below the panel. He'd spotted the panel and pulled himself up into the gap when he was going past. Now he sat, contemplating on how to get past the next part.

"I swear some points of this needs two portal guns..." Wheatley said to himself quietly. He stuck his head out of the gap to look around.

"Oh, there you are." The panel shifted and pushed him out. He screamed as he fell, but the funnel caught him. He floated around a bit, then the funnel suddenly shut off and he fell heavily to the floor. Something in his back cracked as he hit the ground.

"Oww..." He sat up and rubbed it: pain flashed through him, making him groan again.

"I have a surprise for you." _Now what? _Wheatley thought. _Turret party?_

"As you probably haven't figured out by now, this test needs two people to solve it. How you've managed to work out how to get so far by yourself is beyond me. Oh, creative use of the adhesive gel, I see." A tube emerged from a panel in the ceiling.

"So, here, met your new testing partner." Wheatley watched the tube expectantly. Who was to come out of it?

"SpaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAA**AAACCCCCEEE!**" with a clunk, a small figure landed on the floor below the tube. It rose up to it's full height of not even up to Wheatley's shoulders, and started looking around frantically.

"Space? Space! Where's space. Space, not in space, gotta go to space. Space!" He was short, with bright yellow optic darting around and blondish hair. He held a portal gun in his left hand, and it emitted a deep red glow from inside.

"Huh, I guess mine isn't the only one with different colours then..." he went over to the newly android space core.

"Space! Space buddy!" Wheatley was suddenly being tightly hugged by the hyperactive android.

"Ello again. Didn't know she turned you into a human too."

"Space." Wheatley pushed space off, and turned to look around the test chamber. He still didn't see any solution to the current part, but he could figure out a few new things he could try now they had four portals. Mainly how many more places could be reached with the excursion funnel.

"Come on space buddy. Space, gotta solve to space test." Space ran off to a hard light bridge. "Space!" Wheatley sighed and followed behind.

"Whatever, buddy."

* * *

><p>The two androids dropped into a test chamber. The shorter of the two stood up and looked around. he was more heavily built than the other androids, with dark, unkempt synthetic hair and the dark shade of a beard around his lower jaw.<p>

"Alright, what's the situation?"

"Fact: the central AI is testing a new experiment where she transfers cores into humanoid bodies to test them."

Rick looked at the other android. this one was taller, with short, hair, darker than his but not black. _he sure won't last a dangerous situation long, _Rick thought to himeself. _That's where I come in.__  
><em>

"Okay. No need to do anything dangerous, Rick's got this." He turned around to look at the door at the opposite end of the room. A cube sat at near them. Rick judged the distance between the two sides of the acid pit, then at the claw that hung, forgotten, from the ceiling.

"The Adventure sphere has an 89.34% chance of failing what the Adventure sphere is about to do."

Not listening to the fact core, Rick grabbed the cube and ran to the edge of the pit and jumped. He grabbed the claw, holding the cube between his legs, and swung over to the other side of the pit. He landed heavily with a grunt, and placed the cube on the button.

"Easy!" a shot of light blue energy hit the wall beside him, and the fact core came through the portal.

"The chamber was supplied with Aperture Science Handheld Portal Devices and Aperture Science Long Fall Boots to complete the test." He handed Rick a pair of boots and a portal gun.

"Well, it looks like you completed this simple test in a way I hadn't anticipated, well done." The claw receded into the ceiling.

"Please proceed to the chamberlock for the next chamber." The two former cores went through the open door into the elevator. The doors closed, and they waited as it dropped down a few levels. The door opened, and they went through into another chamber. Rick looked around.

"Fact, this chamber is possibly the largest test chamber ever built in Aperture."

"Yeh, whatever." Rick portaled a hard light bridge to them and hopped onto it. "Let's do this!"

* * *

><p>Despite the fact that his inner clock worked now, Wheatley had lost track of time. He and space core were finally within sight of the exit, yet an obstacle of nothing blocked them. There was no bridges, no funnels, no portable surfaces, and jumping plates, nothing. Nothing except what looked like a huge bottomless pit.<p>

"Space."

"Yes, I get it, space. Shut up now. Please!"

"No gravity, anti gravity. Walk on ceilings. Space. Look at space. Look at space."

"What!?" Wheatley looked up. There was a line of purple adhesion gel along the ceiling.

"Oh." He traced it through a hole in the wall, and looked down to see another hole. Space was already crawling through it. Wheatley went over and got on hands and knees to crawl through after him. Inside was an excursion funnel. Both floated up to the gel, and stuck both feet on it. They walked across the gel, upside down, over the pit. Wheatley looked into the pit anxiously, waiting for the gel to fail and send him falling in. but they got over safely. Space jumped and fell down, grabbing a cube that was sitting on a panel and slamming it down onto the button. Wheatley fell after him, landing on his back awkwardly. The pain that had been throbbing there ever since he first met space again came back with even more intensity.

"OWWW!" he sat up slowly. Something in his lower back clicked painfully, and he gently rubbed it. space skipped through the door, and suddenly fell with a yell of "SPACE!"

"Space!" Wheatley jumped up and ran over to where he's disappeared, and ended up falling for the same trap. He yelled as he fell, landing on his back _again_. Though this time he was slightly cushioned by the space core. He rolled off him and pushed himself up onto his knees.

"I'm seriously surprised you even managed to complete that." GLaDOS's voice echoed around the empty room. "Enjoy your stay in this room, I've got other subjects to test right now." The panel above them closed, and the light clicked off, leaving them in total darkness, save for the faint glow from their optics. Space suddenly sat up and pulled at the seams of his jumpsuit.

"What are you doing?"

"Starlight." He pulled the jumpsuit apart slightly, revealing some of his chest. A faint yellow glow emitted from inside him. It helped light the room a bit, even though Wheatley found the situation rather awkward. They sat in silence for a while. About three hours according to Wheatley's internal clock, when the light suddenly flickered back on and the panel above them opened. There were two screams, and Wheatley and space scrambled out of the way just in time for two more androids to crash down right where they had been sitting. They got up, groaning.

"Fact: the Fact sphere and the Adventure sphere have just fallen a distance of 50 feet. This is enough to cause minor damage to the Fact sphere's inner mechanisms." He twitched slightly. The other android was staring at Wheatley.

"Say hello to your new room mates. This is the adventure sphere, he holds the record for being able to start walking in the fastest time- 7.839 seconds, and demonstrate 50 different types of martial arts in under 5 minutes. And this is the fact sphere, holding the record for the most useless facts ever." Fact scowled at GLaDOS's mockery of him.

"The Fact sphere's facts are 100% accurate to the rate of penguins." One of his optics glitched slightly and he twitched a bit, and fell silent.

"Enjoy your stay."

* * *

><p><strong>Yes, I gave Rick a beard.<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**chapter ...7? I've lost count. :I **

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><p>To say GLaDOS liked shoving unsuspecting AIs into android bodies and testing them was an understatement. She was <em>addicted<em> to it, and was not afraid to admit so. She had plucked two more unsuspecting cores off a management rail somewhere and they were currently testing, and as waiting for new bodies for two _turrets_ she had picked up to finish being built. One of the turrets was defective, the other normal. This was the most fun she had experienced in a long while. But something was floating around the back of her mind, constantly gnawing at her. She'd squashed the idea as soon as it appeared, but it kept coming back. Like that virus she had tried to eliminate.

_What would it be like for her to have an android-_

No. Ah, the turrets were finished. She initiated a transfer, and left it to it and went back to thinking.

_It would give her closer access to the facili-_

No! It would take ages to-

_It could be a backup if something goes wrong in the chassis_-

Like that would ever happen, besides, what if something went wrong in the transfer?

_It's worth the risk. After all, there is no science without risk. Do it for science._

That was it. _For science_. She hardly had time to register the fact that she was designing her own model before picking one. The manufacturing wing was already working. Back to the testing. She looked into the test chamber-

What?

An empty room, with a malfunctioning panel slamming against the wall. Behind the panel, GLaDOS could see a catwalk leading away.

_What? Core 177 and 146 escaped? How?_

* * *

><p>Eve had no idea what had gone on in the last few hours. She and Terry were plucked off the management rail by a claw and deposited in a room. It was empty, with no way to escape as there were no core receptacles, no panels, nothing. After about half an hour, the claws came back and picked them up, taking them to another room and plugging them into something. She tried to find out what it was, but had blacked out before doing anything. Then she woke up and bam! She was an android. A quick system scan had informed her of some new programs, and she had activated the walking one to get out of the room, instructing Terry to do the same. They had gone into a test chamber, picked up some boots and a gun, and... well... hacked a panel to escape. She could still hear it clanging against the wall behind her. She and Terry were heading along a catwalk to God knows where. And she was still working out something for that virus.<p>

"So, I guess you were right 'bout the testin' bots, Eve. Only they're us." Eve nodded slowly. She was looking down at another catwalk below, and jumped over the edge onto it. She landed with an echoing _clang._ There was another clang behind her as Terry jumped down.

"So, what we gonna do now we've got arms an' legs?" she shrugged.

"Dunno. GLaDOS only built these things for testing." She reached to her wrist and pulled out an extension lead.

"Huh, didn't know that was there before. That'll be useful." The lead snapped back into her wrist as she let go of it. Looking around, Eve saw Terry pulling an identical lead out and staring at it. He let go of it and went towards her. She turned and continued along the catwalk. For a while, there was nothing. Then both of them felt a shiver run through them. Eve stopped.

"What the hell was that?"

* * *

><p>GLaDOS had made a terrible mistake. In her annoyance about the two testing androids escaping, she had turned to the virus to try and get rid of it, thinking that squashing it would calm her down a bit. She didn't expect this. Not at all. She had thrown an antivirus at it. it vanished. The whole antivirus. Gone. Deleted. And suddenly, the virus was on her. Attacking at her, every program, every line of code. She beat back at it, and had gotten it out of her core programs, but it was still attempting to get in, and was nearly succeeding. She threw a few more antivirus programs, but they met the same fate as the first one. The virus took the opportunity of the antiviruses to breach through the final line of firewalls.<p>

_NO! NONONONONONONONO! GET OUT! GO AWAY!_

**I'm not going anywhere, Darling~**

_What? Who are you? How dare you call me-_

**Ohh, this feels good. You know how boring it is to just be a virus? Sitting there all day, doing nothing? Let me tell you babe, it's nothing compared to this. Wow, this facility is huge! You know what? This is no work for a dainty lady, why don't you give yourself a break and let me take over, huh? Wait, what are you doi-**

GLaDOS took the virus's babbling as an opportunity to force it out. Except it wasn't a virus anymore, it had invaded her core programs and turned itself into an AI.

_No, this can't be happening_. She faintly heard the virus shout 'but it is!' _how can a small virus like that do this? It wasn't doing anything, now I can't even look at it without it attacking. It's trying to take over the facility? What virus does that? Then again, what virus calls somebody 'Darling'? Me no less! What can I do? Nothing I try works. If I stay here much longer, it'll take me over and most probably force me into an unnameable root vegetable or delete me completely. What can I do? Is there anyone good at murdering AIs-_

_This is the most terrible idea ever. But it seems I have no other choice._

* * *

><p>"Spaceee! Space, gotta go to space. You know what I like about space? Space."<p>

"Space does not exist."

"Oh shut up four-eyes. I know space exists, I've been in it! for twelve months. TWELVE. FUCKING. MONTHS. You know what's up there? Nothing! Nothing at all!"

"The Adventure sphere has not been to space. The Adventure sphere was experiencing a massive hallucination caused by an overload of plastic cups balanced on the nearest furniture." The fact core twitched.

"Space."

"Shut up about space already!" Wheatley sat in the corner, hugging his knees to his chest, listening to the three androids bicker about random matters. He'd guess he wasn't invited into the conversation from the way the two androids glared at him. Rick looked like he was about to punch him into pieces, then punch those pieces into even smaller pieces. And quite frankly, Wheatley wasn't surprised. He'd kept out of the way.

"Space, we were in space!"

"DAMMIT, WE KNOW! SPACE, YOU IN SPACE, ALL ABOUT SPACE, SHUT UP ABOUT SPACE!"

"Space core never went to s-"

"YOU SHUT UP AS WELL!" the harsh lights suddenly came on. All four androids blinked in the sudden brightness. The panel above them opened as a claw came through. They watched it slowly descend to just above their heads, and it hesitated, before suddenly swinging to grab Wheatley.

"ARRRGHHH!" he screamed and struggled against the grip, but it lifted him out of the room. The other androids watched him go. The panel closed, blocking his view of them.

"Okay Moron, this is the worst idea, I've ever had. But I need you. Right now." The claw carried him over what he thought was miles of facility, before stopping over a large dome. The claw opened, and he screamed, bracing himself for the fall. A panel opened, and he fell through and landed heavily on the floor of the central AI chamber. He gasped and looked up. GLaDOS hung over him, staring at him. Something seemed different about her though. She didn't move as smoothly as before, almost as if she was in pain.

"I've looked through you memory files, and I know what you want to do most. I have a confession to make; No, I did not kill the lunatic." Wheatley stared.

"You didn't kill the lady?"

"No, I lied; it was a rather successful attempt to crush your spirits. I know what you want to do, Moron. Find her, apologize to her and have her forgive you. Well, I'm going to let you do just that- the forgiving part, I don't know if that'll happen. But on one condition: you bring her back to this facility. I've tracked her down, and I'll send the Aperture Science Avian Killing Machines to guide you there. Get in the elevator." GLaDOS didn't give Wheatley the choice, as she picked him up and dropped him in the elevator. The doors closed before he could react.

"Wait, why are you doing this? Do I have to bring her back? This will not make her forgive me! Look, I don't know what you're doing here but- AAAAARRGH BIRD BIRD BIRD BIRD BIRD BIRD BIRD BIRD!"

Three crows had flown through a gap in the elevator door. Two were sitting on the ground and one on Wheatley's head, making him freak out. He scrambled away from them. The one on his head cawed indignantly and landed by the other two. The elevator began rising before he could even think about escaping. It rose jerkily, as he stared at the crows. The crows stared back. One of them cawed. After rising for a while, the elevator stopped and the door opened. Wheatley shakily stepped out. There was a sudden bright light. Wheatley's optics contracted. The three crows flew out of the door that had opened. Wheatley followed. He stepped out into the light. All around him was a field of golden wheat, stretching as far as the eye could see.

"Huh... wheat... Wheatley... that's funny." A caw brought him to attention. The crows had landed in a line pointing in a direction. He jumped when GLaDOS's voice came out over one of the things the closest crow was wearing.

"Follow the crows, and don't even think about running away. Oh- and put this on to hide the jumpsuit." The shed he was standing in front of suddenly spat out a lab coat. He picked it up, wondering how he would fit it over the handles protruding from his shoulders. After a while, he found her could fold them over his body, out of the way, he slipped the lab coat on and buttoned it up, then went towards the crows. The nearest one cawed and flew off the way he was meant to go. He set off in a run after it, the other two following behind.

* * *

><p>"Virus." Eve turned away from the receptacle she was plugged into. Terry nodded slowly.<p>

"A pretty tough one, eh? If the main bot can't beat it, then whadda hell can?"

"I wish I got rid of it sooner! Who know what would happen now? This whole place is a giant block of code! If something infects it, we're dead!" she burst through a door into a room. It was dark. Eve found a plug and turned on the light. Terry gasped.

"Look, another testin' robot!" he went over to the body plugged into a machine not unlike the one that transferred Eve into her body. It was a female. One side of her hair was shorter than the other, and was silvery, but the longer side seemed to be a darker brown at the tips. She brushed a bit of the synthetic hair out of the android's optics.

**Central Core Transfer Initiated**

Eve leapt back.

"Did I do that?" the machine sparked. Eve turned the lights off, feeling more concealed in the darkness. Terry stepped behind her. They watched if fascinated horror as the android twitched and sparked. _Oh got what is going on?_ Finally, it stopped. There was silence for a while, then the android opened her eyes. Eve gasped. They were a cold amber, just like-

_No. No no no. Nope. Not believing this, not believing this, nope nopity nope._

She stepped back a bit as the android locked eyes with her.

"You. You're the ones who escaped from the test chamber."

* * *

><p><strong>Noooow everyone hates me. sorry about the androids everywhere.<strong>


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter... 8? Yes, 8**

**Also, thanks for the favs and follows, this fanfic is getting more attention than I ever thought it would.**

* * *

><p>Wheatley stumbled through the field. He'd been getting worried, as his internal battery read 2%.<p>

_What would happen if I ran out of battery? Would I die? Do I have a backup power supply? _The crows had long since returned to the facility, leaving him to wander in field after field in the dark. He had activated a very convenient and usefully placed 'night vision' program. It helped him see, but it drained his battery alarmingly fast. He looked around, hoping he'd been going in the right direction. There were some lights in the distance. _Yes!_ He headed towards them. A light broke over the horizon. Then sun was coming up. He deactivated the night vision, stumbling towards the lights in the dark. The grass caught against the blades of his long fall boots. Picking up his pace, he ran towards the lights as the sun rose higher in the sky. _Battery 1%_. Wheatley could feel programs shutting down inside him. He overbalanced and fell, before pushing himself up again and carrying on. The pain in his lower back intensified again. A shape suddenly reared out of the grass in front of him.

"Whoa!"

"Arrrgh?" Wheatley fell, and a crack came from his back. He tried to get up again, but for some reason he couldn't support himself anymore.

"Oh, hey, you alright fella?" the figure leaned over him as he lay, groaning, in the grass. He tried to push himself up again, but his arms gave out and he flopped back down. The figure reached down to him, then pulled back.

"Are those Aperture boots you're wearing?" Wheatley froze.

"Ah, yes. Just like the lady who stumbled out from here about a year ago. Thought Aperture was a dead place before that happened. Now we've got two people from there with a year of each other. What happened to keep you in there? Oh yes, there are a few mentions of a mass murder there, if I remember correctly, but it was sorta overshadowed by the whole alien invasion thing that happened-"

"Lady?" Wheatley asked. He wasn't sure, but something told him it was. "T-take me to h-h-her-"

_Battery at 0%. Shutting down all core functions._ The world went dark.

"Hey, guys, come over and help me, this guy's heavier than he looks!" two more men raced over to help him with the long-limbed body in the grass.

"what happened?"

"Dunno, he just blacked out on me. Oh God, is he breathing?"

"Doesn't look like it." they dragged Wheatley slowly over the grass towards the town.

"He told me to take him to that woman that came out from here a year ago. What as her name again? Shell?"

"Chell. Why though?"

"He has the same boots, probably from the same place."

* * *

><p>Eve backed towards the door, but it had slammed shut. Terry was beating his fist against it uselessly.<p>

"Stop that, you're giving me a headache." The Android was sat in the machine, still staring at them. No doubt, that voice sounded horrifyingly familiar.

"Ugh, I feel so disconnected from the facility..." she stretched an arm out and looked over it.

"This was a bad idea, but it was the only thing I could do... if that virus hadn't of..." the muttering trailed off, and she snapped back to stare at Eve once again.

"Virus? It forced you out of your body into...?" Eve gulped.

"Yes, I was forced into this unfinished pile of scrap." She sighed and stood up. Eve tried to back away more, but it was impossible as her back was already pressed hard against the door.

"How did you even know about the virus?"

"Being a programmer, I have a natural urge to plug myself into the system as often as possible to maintain this facility."

"Core: Identity / Primary_Function." GLaDOS suddenly shouted out at her.

Eve felt herself jerk into a straight position at the core command.

"Core: [Identity-no:177]. Primary_function: To create and maintain computer coding and programs around Aperture Science Laboratories."

GLaDOS raised an eyebrow.

"Programmer core. That's interesting." Eve shook the automatic stiffness off. She observed GLaDOS's android closely. It seemed very well-made, despite what GLaDOS said about it. of course, she didn't except anything less from her.

"So, you escaped from my testing chambers earlier. Question- how did you do that?" GLaDOS tipped her head to one side slightly with the question. Eve shrugged.

"Simple, hack a panel, mess with its programming, make it malfunction and open, walk out."

"Hacker. Hm, it makes sense for a programmer core to get corrupted to start hacking. I'm surprised you're not in the incinerator."

Eve tried once again to back away. This time, the door opened, making her fall backwards onto the catwalk. GLaDOS loomed over her. She squeaked a bit and shuffled back.

"Hey, I've been trying to get rid of that virus! I can help you with that! Well, I could of, but you-" She caught a glimpse of Terry frantically shaking his head at her.

"Uh... took over the job?" Terry facepalmed. Eve cringed.

"I should not have said anything. Shit, I said something." To her surprise, GLaDOS just looked down.

"Hm..." Eve slowly stood up. The pathway to run away was clear, but GLaDOS would probably crush her with a catwalk or something. Unless... Eve thought back to what GLaDOS had said.

_Ugh, I feel so disconnected from the facility... _

_Wait, she isn't controlling the facility anymore? Oh God, last time that happened, the whole place nearly blew up-_

"Yes, which is why I need to get rid of this virus and get back in my body."

"You can read my thoughts?"

"When you say them out loud, yes."

"Oh."

* * *

><p><em>Battery at 3%. Rebooting Android_Intelligence_ <em>

Wheatley gradually felt his systems rebooting. His optics came back online, and he blinked around the room. He was lying on a table in what looked like a hastily-thrown together workshop. He sat up, noticing that the pain in his lower back was finally gone. He felt around the area, and noticed that the top half of his jumpsuit had been peeled off.

_What?_

"It's rebooted." Wheatley looked around. There were two men in the room. One was looking at something that was glowing, the other at him. He waved at them.

"Hello!" they stared at him.

"It spoke?"

"Yes, Greg did say it spoke to him." Wheatley huffed at them.

"I am not an 'it'. Well, if you call a robot 'it' I guess I am, but, My name is Wheatley, and I'm looking for someone. Can you help me?" they still stared at him. Oh for goodness sake- Wheatley turned and slid off the table. His boots had been removed, much to his annoyance. He stood up and realised he was plugged into the glowing Mmnitor. He felt around the lead going into the back of his neck. finally, after an awkward moment of scilence, one of the men spoke.

"A sentient robot? Whoa, that'll be worth a lot of money." Wheatley waved at them.

"Hello, talking to you here! I need you to help me find someone. She's a lady, about average height, I guess? I don't really know what average height is.. Uh, dark brown hair, grey eyes, wearing an orange jumpsuit and boots like-" he lifted a leg, then remembered that his boots had been removed.

"Uh, like the ones that have been taken off me." He looked around for them, but couldn't see them. "Where are they anyway?"

"What are you?"

"Oh, you're finally speaking to me." Wheatley huffed. "I'm Wheatley. Nice to meet you, uh... what's your name?" They had gone back to the glowing screen. "Oh for goodness sake-" He went over to them and slammed the lid of the monitor shut. They jumped and stared at him.

"I'm talking here, stop ignoring me!"

"Can you understand me?" one of them asked.

"Of course I can! Can you understand me? I've been speaking for the last five minutes but all you've done is ignore me!"

"What do you mean you're looking for a lady?" one of them butted in. "In boots like the ones you had on and an orange jumpsuit? Sounds like Chell."

"Okay, if it had anything to do with Aperture, then yes, it must be her. Can I see her?" Wheatley started towards the door, but the lead tugged at him. He turned around and stared at it in annoyance. He couldn't move from the room until he had recharged. Well, he could, but he'd rather make it back to the facility in one trip. He sat down on the table and resigned himself to a few hours of doing nothing.

A knock came from the door.

Wheatley watched one of the men go over and open the door. Behind was a woman. With brown hair in a ponytail, grey eyes and-

_Oh God._

The lady stepped forward and said something to the man. He mumbled back and gestured at Wheatley. He was sure he heard his name in there somewhere. The woman, whose name was apparently Chell, stared at him. He looked down uncertainly, and gave a throat-clearing sound.

"Ahem. Uh... uhm... Hello!" Dammit. He'd rehearsed this so many times in space until it was perfect, now he had come to it, didn't know what to say. He raised a hand and gave a small wave and an awkward grin, by let them drop when he saw the way Chell was glaring at him. He sighed.

"Are we disturbing something here? Sorry, we'll leave now." The two men walked out the door.

Wheatley watched them leave. He sat on the table, not knowing what to do. They both stared at each other for a while. Finally:

"Rob told me your name is Wheatley. And that you're from Aperture." Wheatley nodded slowly.

"Y-y-yes... I..." he gulped. "What do I say what do I say what do I say..." Chell tipped her head to one side, as if waiting for something.

"I... uh... I'm sorry? Oh God, this sounded so much better in my head..." he dug deep through his memory files, searching for a way to apologise. He looked down.

"I... I wish I could take it all back. I do, really, I do. Not because I got stranded in space for God knows how long, but... uh... yeah... uh... I truly am really sorry, that I was so bossy, monstrous... that I tried to kill you... uh... yeah... And that's all I really have to say. I'm sorry." He flicked his optics up at Chell. Her expression hadn't changed. Well, that was it, right? He had finally apologised, what he had wanted to do ever since he was freed from the corruption of the mainframe. So why did he still feel like he had a burden on his shoulders. His optics contracted.

_But on one condition: you bring her back to this facility._ That was what he was out here to do. Kidnap Chell from her new life here and pull her back into the place she probably never wanted to go near again. He gulped. _How can I do this? Do I have to? _He noticed he had finished recharging. He unplugged himself and ran past her out of the room. The two men in the corridor outside were talking, and stopped to watch in confusion as Wheatley fled out of the building. He didn't stop until he was just outside the town. He sat on a rock and stared into the distance. _What do I do? I can't take her away, she'll never forgive me._ Some footsteps sounded behind him.

"You forgot these." The long fall boots and lab coat were thrown to the ground behind him. He looked behind at Chell. She still stared at him.

"You're not here to apologise, are you?" Wheatley stiffened. How could she know? She stood in front of him, arms crossed. He frowned.

_Might as well get it over with._

"Please, Chell, forgive me for this. I don't want to do this." He brought one of the boots up and whacked her over the head with it. She flopped to the ground, unconscious.

_Oh God oh God oh God did I kill her- no, she's still breathing, good._

Pulling on the jumpsuit, lab coat and boots, he slung Chell's listless form over his shoulder and broke into a run back to the facility.

* * *

><p>Chell slowly regained consciousness. Her head throbbed, and she swore she could feel a bit of blood running down from her forehead. The world around her jerked unsteadily. She opened one eye and watched the ground below go by alarmingly fast.<p>

_I knew he wasn't there to apologise._

Wheatley stopped suddenly, and banged on something. Chell cringed at the noise.

"H-hello? Let me in! quick, before she- urk!" Chell twisted up as best as she could and grabbed him around the neck. her time in the facility may had adapted her to take advantage of just about any situation, but she sure as hell was not going back in there. Using his weight and tall stature against him, she pulled him to the ground and held him there. He stared up at her, his optics tiny dots of light. Chell didn't know what she was doing, trying to choke a robot, but it scared him either way. She got up to run, but the door suddenly slammed open. Both of them were grabbed by claws that reached out of the elevator, and pulled in. Chell gasped as she saw the door slam shut and plunge them into darkness. Wheatley whimpered. Chell turned to glare at him, but did not speak. She'd vowed to herself to never speak in the facility, and she'll uphold it to the day she died. The claws came down into the central AI chamber. Was something different?

The chassis hung limp in the room. All of the panels were malfunctioning, and turrets were being bounced around on aerial faith plates. The giant robot's head twitched slightly, following the movement of the turrets and they screamed and fired bullets everywhere. It swung upwards suddenly, staring at both of them. Chell frowned. Something _was _different. The amber glow of the eye wasn't the same. It was... colder... somehow. If that was even possible. Wheatley seemed to have picked up on this as well, as he fell silent and stared. The final evidence of 'something was different' came from the cheery male voice that came over the speakers.

**Oh, hello there! Was not expecting visitors from the outside, thought there wasn't anybody out there anymore. How are you, darling? You do look great. Myself? Ooh, never been better. It's fun being an AI over a virus, you know? I can actually do things. Like-**

The announcer suddenly broke in.

**Warning. Reactor Core Meltdown Imminent. Prepare To Evacuate Facility.**

**What? Ooh, did I do something wrong? Sorry babe, gotta go and sort some things out. Be right back~.** The robot fell silent.

_Virus? What is going on here?_ She looked over a Wheatley. The look of shock and confusion on his face told her he hadn't been expected this at all.

"Wait, she had a _virus?_ Why didn't she tell me anything? I could have gotten back faster. Oh god, did I inadvertently destroy the facility? Again? No, this is not good! Not good in the slightest!" he started struggling against the claw. "Hello? Where is she? Where did you put her? I need to find her. Don't know why, but-"

**Ah, fixed. There, no exploding. If somebody had told me that this place will explode if not maintained properly I would of got to that straight away! But nooo, nobody tells a virus anything, all we're here for is to annoy people. Well, I'm going to change that. Tell people that viruses are more than that! People will rue the day they think a virus is an annoyance to be removed- oh! Sorry, got lost in my thoughts there, girl. What's your name? I bet it's a pretty one, just like you.** The head drew close to Chell. She glared and remained silent.

**Stubborn aren't you? Well, I like people like that. Stubborn, tough, hard to break. You get so much fun out of them...** The voice grew dark on the last few lines. There was a scream as Wheatley was tossed away through some open panels, and Chell was taken to the other side of the room. A panel dragged itself away, and she was dropped down the hole. Wait.

"I DON'T HAVE LONG FALL BOOTS ON!"

**Whoops.** A panel shot out, and she slammed into it painfully. Groaning, she looked up as a pair of long fall boots fell down beside her, then hesitantly pulled them on. As soon as she tightened that last strap-

**There. Not falling to you death now, huh? **The panel pulled away, and Chell was falling once again.

* * *

><p>"You detected the virus before me? If you're so good at programming why didn't you get rid of it?"<p>

"I tired, but nothing worked. Now it's an obvious AI, it should be easier. I have coding to delete AIs-"

"Um. Why?" GLaDOS stared at Eve, a bit worried.

"Uh. I mean, I can make some coding to delete AIs..." she looked down. Why did she have coding to delete AIs again? Um.

Before she knew what was going on, GLaDOS had connected one of her extension leads into a port on her arm and was copying them over to her.

"Wait, what are you doing-" GLaDOS had already run off. Eve ran after her, stumbling as the blades of her long-fall-boots caught on loose pieces of catwalk. She ran faster until she was back in the room that GLaDOS first woke in. GLaDOS had already plugged herself into a receptacle. Eve pulled out an extension cord and plugged herself in. her body went limp as she dived into the code of Aperture. She quickly picked up GLaDOS's trail. _She's not even trying to conceal herself. This is bad, this is really bad. _she followed after her. The trail led straight to the files of the central AI chamber.

_She better not be taking on that virus with that piece of crap code.. She is, isn't she. Okay, I get being forced out of your body is rather distressing but this is ridiculous. She should know better than this._ She floated around the coding, looking for a way to get in. she broke through the firewalls, looking around for any sign of GLaDOS. Attacking the virus head on. Great! She navigated through some programs, closer, until she was as close as she could get without being detected.

_You're fighting a losing battle there..._ it was true. Eve watched as the virus smothered GLaDOS until she almost couldn't see her. She dove forward and grabbed what she could see, and pulled out again.

**What? Who are you? Leave me to my own business, whoever you are. Wait? Where you taking her? Stop it. where've you gone? I can't see you-**

Shutting out the virus, Eve dragged GLaDOS back to the room her android was in. she set one of the machines to work to re transfer her back into the android, before going and transferring herself back into the body she had. She stood up and unplugged herself, and prepared to give GLaDOS a ten page essay on everything wrong with what she just did. She marched up to the android that was still connected, and prodded it.

It didn't move.

"Hey, GLaDOS?" still no answer.

"GLaDOS? Are you there?" the android was silent, then suddenly sprung to life.

"What just happened? Where am I? Is the virus gone? I hope it's gone. NO, no no no no no what are you doing? I know you, you're the tumour. I'm a potato! No no no no, Can you murder this bird for me? Ow, stop!" Eve poked GLaDOS again.

"Ow!"

_What the hell-_

"Terry, what is-" she looked around. There was no one else in the room.

"Terry?"

"There will be cake!" Eve sighed. Terry had gone off and abandoned her with whatever the hell GLaDOS was now.

"All Aperture science equipment remains safely operation in temperatures up to 4000 degrees Kelvin."

There was silence for a while, then GLaDOS shook herself.

"What's going on?"

"You made the terrible mistake of trying to fight a virus with a piece of crap."

"Virus!" Eve sighed and buried her face in one of her hands. This was going to be a nightmare.

* * *

><p><strong>I made GLaDOS a mess. And I'm proud of it :)<strong>


End file.
